I started to feel it tonight...that old familiar feeling. I could feel my walls starting to crumble. Those strong walls that life has forced me to put up. The walls that protect me and my children. It was one of those nights that you take a good look at your life and realize you've just been going through the motions, so afraid to feel that you're not even really living. FEAR. It's everywhere: I'm afraid of not being strong enough for my girls. I'm afraid of being alone. I'm afraid of being a single mother. I'm afraid of uncertainty. And i've been so preoccupied with keeping those walls up that i've let fear take over every aspect of my life. It's not a good feeling.

I want to take this situation and turn it into something beautiful. Granted, it's not ideal but it's reality...I can take it and show my girls how to be strong, how to handle difficulty with grace and composure. We can't always choose what happens in our lives but we can choose how we react.

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." . . . You must do the thing you think you cannot do." Eleanor Roosevelt